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Recipes for Creating Epiphanies

The holidays are a perfect time for baking and cooking… but an epiphany?

The word “Epiphany” can be both a holiday and a feeling.

Perhaps you know that the Epiphany holiday is celebrated near January 6, as a traditional time for feasts, fruitcakes, Twelfth Night, and the manifestation of Jesus to the Maggi.  In Colorado, people celebrate by catapulting fruitcakes.  In France, people eat the “King Cake” until a child finds the porcelain bean and is declared “King for the Day.”  A baptism connected to sudden surprise.  I love how we mash traditions and beliefs into one holiday.

The feeling of Epiphany  is a sudden realization, that “Eureka!” moment, when we discover something important (such as gravity), or something spiritual (such as God.)  In fact, psychologists study the feeling of epiphany when studying innovation.  Philosophers study supernatural insight.  Mystics study the conditions that support epiphanies.

Hmmm.

Why not celebrate both the holiday and the feeling?

What if we could, somehow, select the ingredients, create a recipe, then bake a fertile climate for epiphanies?  For instance, if we mashed together “preparation” and “inspiration”?  Or “market” and “opportunity”?  Or “buyer” and “seller”?  Or chocolate on top of  peanut butter cookies?

As a coach I help people design their future.  Kind of like helping them create the recipe, so that they can frost the cake.  The coaching process has 3 steps:  1) increasing awareness (of your strengths, a situation…),  2) taking action (with intentional constructive steps toward your personal and professional goals), and 3) driving accountability (determining what works, then doing more of that…”

I wonder if we can create Epiphanies, in a similar way?

Religious leaders and mystics talk about “Thin Places.”  These may be cathedrals (like Winchester) or ancient sites (like Stonehenge) that enable us to feel connected to the supernatural or spiritual.  If you have ever looked through stained glass, or sung in Handel’s Messiah, then you know about Thin Places.

For me, natural wild places are perfect conditions for Epiphanies.  Last week, for instance, I was running along a rocky ridge line in New Hampshire.  Imagine spruce and fir trees.  Ancient granite.  Snow and ice.  A good friend nearby.  Spectacular views of lakes and mountains.  Then imagine the sun setting into crimson lines of endless colors.  In that Thin Place I felt more spiritual than physical.

My epiphany was that, despite advancing age, I always feel stronger after a run.  Connected to something ancient.  Thankful for being alive.

So, here is a short Recipe for Creating Epiphanies:

1. Be physically active every day

2.  Serve others

3.  Do meaningful work

4.  Consider possibilities

5.  Maximize living in the Now

6.  Design the Future

 

And let me know how it goes…

Do you think it is possible to celebrate both the holiday and the feeling of epiphany?

Welcome to this blog, plus some tips

Welcome,

It may be obvious, however, I want to encourage you to:

1.  Scroll over the boxes/categories on the sidebar for key words that interest you.

2.  Enter any word in the search button.  Then follow that post to more posts.

3.  Write a comment.  Your thoughts are more important than mine.

4.  Forward any posts to your friends/colleagues.

5.  Join the RSS feed so that you receive regular blog updates as they are posted.

The purpose of this blog is to share what works.

So, what works for you?

 

Daddy, What are the 2 keys to success?

Recently our high school-aged daughter asked, “Daddy, you talk to people all day long about their success.  If you can make it simple, what are the two keys to success?”

If she was quizzing me, then I failed.   Perhaps because I did not expect the question, perhaps because I wanted to say something special to her.

I said something trite:  Focus on your strengths.  Persist.  Follow your passions.  Build a great team.  But sadly, like most of us, perhaps, I just  could not find the words.  Frankly, I struck out.

Then yesterday someone made it simple.  Now I can answer her…

What are the 2 keys to success?

1.  Attention, and 2.  Support.

Just as we attend to an infant and support their growth, we create gardens of success.  Every successful person talks about those who gave them attention.  Their mentors.  Their elders.  Their coaches.  Those who listened well, believed in them, supported them.    After repeated actions toward a desirable goal, those people thrived and eventually felt successful.

This morning I shared this idea with someone.  She doodled a circle, then drew an exclamation point, bold, in the center of the circle, to represent “attention,” then she gave it legs to represent “support,” then gave it an arrow to represent a future success.  That image works!

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The same pattern occurs in a coaching engagement.  When I first meet someone they may be uncertain of the process, unclear about why they are receiving the attention.    A common fear is that coaching is a process of “fixing behavioral gaps or deficiencies.”  As if we could dunk people into a “flea and tick bath” and they emerge cleaned, ready for the next challenge.  Instead, people decide if they like the attention, if they can use the support, and if they want to develop their strengths.    That choice is the key to success.

So, key coaching questions may include, “Who do you need to give more attention to?”   Or, “How can you support someone’s strengths?”

Time to go… I now have an answer for my daughter.

What are you going to do?

 

From Total Immersion Swimming to …. your challenges

My undergraduate roommate was a NCAA swim champion.  All of his friends shaved their heads and legs to prepare for important swim meets.  And they coerced me (and everyone who lived in that hallway) to take swimming lessons.  So, I became a Water Safety Instructor (WSI).  Years later I taught advanced lifesaving skills at a summer camp.

I swam for only two reasons:  1) to cool off when it was hot outside, or 2) to survive.   Later, I taught whitewater kayaking and canoeing.  When the rapids tossed my boat upside down or sideways I had to swim hard.  My helmet had a sticker saying “Don’t Drown- It will Spoil Your Day.”   So I flailed in order to survive.

I never learned to swim a proper freestyle.  I learned to flail.  To survive.

When I turned 51, one of my triathlon buddies cornered me.  “So, when are you going to get past this head trash?  When are you going to learn to swim properly?”

He pointed me toward Total Immersion Swimming instruction.  I checked out videos on YouTube.  Their instructors looked smoother than Michal Phelps.  I was ready to face my fears.  So I hired a local coach and stumbled toward the local pool.

Coach Dinah siad, “Show up at 0800 with goggles.  You don’t need to prepare anything.”  She was wrong.

I bought goggles, but did not know how to fit them.  They leaked.  She taught me to mush them into my face until they created suction and kept the water out.  Lesson #1= do what you can to at least look like a swimmer.

From the bottom dresser drawer, I grabbed the 20+ year old purple triathlon swim shorts.  My wife said, “Those are too short to wear.”  She was right.  When I got to the locker room I learned that the elastic was gone.  Unfazed, I stapled the waist band 1″ shorter.  McGyver-style.  Then I stuck a jumbo-sized paper clip into the waistband.  As if that could keep those old shorts from falling down.  When I leaned forward they revealed more than anyone needed to see…

Coach Dinah pulled out her video camera and simply said, “Show me your best stroke.  Off you go.”

When I shared the video clips with my wife and daughters, later that night, they laughed until one rolled onto the floor.  My shorts nearly slid off my backside.  My arms flailed. I made thousands of bubbles…. and made it 2/3 of the way across the pool.

Just one more example of a time when the phrase “conscious incompetence” applies.  I stood a long distance from “unconscious competence” or mastery.  This process had started ugly…

I certainly had a lot of room to develop.

Coaching others is similar…

I know that we can each face challenges and develop new behaviors.  I know that we can change.  I know that we can overcome bad habits, we can improve patterns that formerly caused us to flail.

Coach Dinah is helping me embrace new challenges.  Here are some takeaways.  They may apply to your world too:

  • Regular practice helps develop new skills  In the last 14 days, I skipped 10 days, then practiced 4 days in a row.  That is more than ever, but not enough.
  • Video trumps imagination.  I had never imagined how poor my form was.  The video provided objective data, undeniable evidence, of the current state.  The YouTube and instructional videos provided different evidence, of an improved state.
  • Breathing is not necessary.  I loved this idea.  Coach Dinah explained that for the first few sessions my focus needed to be on proper body position to reduce resistance.  She said, “Just put your head down and go.” Perhaps someday I will get to the lesson that includes proper breathing technique…
  • When scared, just stand up.  The pool water depth varies from 3.5 to 5 feet.  No problem.  I can stand up, and breathe with confidence, at any time.

Call me foolish, but every so many years I need to learn a new skill.   Life is filled with challenges.  I no longer want to be scared by the idea of a long freestyle swim.  So it is time to learn some new behaviors.

How about you?

What challenges are you confronting?

And how is your “Coach Dinah” helping you progress?