Proposals, feedback process, and why dogs are wiser than you.
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The Importance of Active Listening in Executive Coaching
Communication problems abound. The #1 complaint from leaders and managers is “poor communication.” Today, effective communication is more important than ever and developing active listening skills is a necessity in all aspects of your professional and personal life… You can learn to be a better active listener.
Executive coaching requires expertise in communication skills such as ‘Active Listening.’
Did you know that there are three levels of active listening? Those three levels are described below.
Active listening a coachable skill that leaders and managers can develop with practice. Active listening is a fundamental interpersonal communication skill that helps leaders and managers be better communicators and problem solvers.
Active listening is not only key to rewarding conversation and true empathetic engagement but also has the potential to increase positive emotions. I often say, “A good conversation is as stimulating as dark coffee, but more memorable.” Why is that? Active listening can increase our subjective well-being and provide greater life satisfaction.
The three levels of active listening are level 1: internal listening, (e.g., the client is looking inside, but the coach may be listening to how that story affects the coach), level 2: Focused listening (e.g., the coach is laser-focused on the client’s agenda) and level 3: Global listening (e.g., the coach is focused on global cues including intuition, emotions, body language or the environment.) Do you notice the differences? Now reflect on that last conversation you had with a client or colleague. Was it at level 1, or level 2 or level 3?
In addition to those three levels of active listening, there are four main types of active listening that require the listener to hear, evaluate and interpret the content of speech. You can practice each of these techniques.
- Paraphrase. One way to develop empathy and practice active listening is by paraphrasing. The listener repeats the essence of the message spoken by the communicator using their own words. This demonstrates that the listener is actively concentrating on the message the communicator is trying to convey. Paraphrasing can be the most challenging Active Listening technique to perfect as it requires skill as well as discipline. TIP: Record your paraphrase using your smartphone. Then share it with your colleague and ask, “Is this an accurate paraphrase?” It works.
- Reflected emotions. Another tool leadership development coaching utilizes to teach active active listening involves reflecting the feelings of the communicator. This type of active listening establishes an emotional rapport between the communicator and the listener. Be careful when using this technique. Emotions describe another person’s state (e.g., mad, sad, glad, happy, or….) Judgements or opinions are not the same as emotions. Be careful to state emotions only (not judgements) when reflecting emotions to another person. TIP: State something like, “If I understand you correctly you are feeling _____ emotion because of ______ action. Is that accurate?”
- Reflected meaning. Another way to establish rapport between a leader and a colleague, or between a speaker and listener, is through reflected meaning. Reflected meaning focuses on the factual message of the speaker instead of the emotional communication. As an example, use data or facts to build your case. Like a lawyer. State the facts, only the facts, and include numbers, dates, details. The result of repeating those factual details is that i the listener nods their head, as if confirming understanding with the speaker. TIP: Some leadership coaches practice reflected meaning using a communication script such as “When ____ (action) occurs, you feel ______ (emotion) and want to do _____ (new behavior or action). Is that accurate?”
- Summative reflection. Finally, summative reflection includes a confirmation of the message content. Summative reflection can be the most difficult type of active listening to exercise but the power of summative reflection is that it strengthens interpersonal ties and promotes efficiency in the communication process. Summative reflection combines the elements of paraphrasing, reflected meaning and reflected emotion and requires the listener to incorporate personal views into the communicator’s message. TIP: Take notes when coaching someone, so that you can accurately summarize the essential details and validate the leader’s concerns.
Active listening can be taught, and can be coached. Active listening helps leaders to build relationships, solve problems, resolve conflicts and improve accuracy.
Whether you’re looking for an executive coach in Nashville or worldwide you can find more information on executive coaching and active listening by calling Action Learning Associates at (615) 603-3638.
What is the best certification or methodology for executive coaching?
Recently I was asked this question by someone who desperately wanted to be certified as an “executive coach.”
Be careful. Here are the facts.
There is not one “best coaching certification or methodology for those who work with executives,” for several reasons.
1. Executive coaching is a new approach with a short history (about 20 years) within psychology (about 100 years). The protocols that would be “certifiable” have not yet been well defined. There is no external board or established practices, as in other professions such as healthcare, finance or law. I often ask, “Who certifies the certifiers?” (And I have been certified by several coaching providers for decades.) One example of certification based on my dissertation research with global professional coaches is here.
2. The coach training industry is estimated at 53,500 global coach practitioners and over $7B in annual revenue, with 115 accredited coach training programs (ICF, 2016). The reality is that coaching certifications and silly acronyms abound. I co-developed one back in 1999, when there were only about 20 ICF accredited coach training programs.
3. There is market confusion about definitions and coaching outcomes. The result is that vendors have responded to the market confusion. A gap exists between theory and practice because executive coaching lacks rigorous measurement, evidence-based protocols and standard processes. The largest organization, the International Coaching Federation (ICF) stated “the top future obstacles for coaching are (a) untrained individuals and (b) marketplace confusion (ICF, 2016).” That survey understates the confusion. Your question illustrates the desire by many to “get certified.”
4. In any marketplace vacuum, competitors emerge. Countless colleges and universities will declare that their certification programs define standards. Be careful. That archaic model presumes that academics know best, and we are increasingly aware of disruption in the marketplace. I like academics. My dissertation explored the competitive advantage of coaching protocols, using global professional coaches. As the “coaching profession” develops momentum, I encourage you to study the practical market demands for coaching protocols. You may want to be cautious. “The top future opportunities for coaching are (a) increased awareness of the benefits of coaching, and (b) credible data on ROI/ROE/outcomes (ICF, 2016)”. In short, we need to define protocols for outcome-based coaching, including useful certification programs.
5. Certification programs exist. I favor the ROI methodology described at the ROI Institute, and a 2-level executive coaching certification process. Last week the co-founder, Patti Phillips, and I discussed certification programs that moved beyond knowledge to practical demonstrations of mastery. She encouraged me to focus on practical applications. (Disclosure: I trademarked the AD-FIT coaching protocol when some F500 clients asked “How do you operationalize what works?” Those details are at Products Archive – Action Learning (https://actionlearnin.wpengine.com/products/) and throughout this website. The fact is that “Many professional consultants or coaches do not adhere to evidence-based protocols (Foster & Auerbach, 2015; MacKie, 2014. Citation sources available upon request.)
6. Organizational clients may design their own executive coaching certification programs. They are cost-effective and foster cultural expectations. (Disclosure: I also serve as an engagement manager and executive coach at CoachSource | Executive Coaching Excellence (http://coachsource.com/), the largest global provider of executive coaching.) Those internal coaching certification programs are customized internally, with expertise from coaches like me, for specific business outcomes that are proprietary.
Bottom line: Certification for executive coaching implies a mature profession with protocols that satisfy a market demand.
If useful, please contact me here. I’d love to discuss your interest in executive coaching certification programs.
All the best, Doug
3 Managers Walked Into A Bar Last Friday During Happy Hour…
Three managers walked into a bar to complain about organizational leadership…
The first manager, Mr. Ph.D., said, “organizational change requires clear definitions of terms and adoption of a theoretical model for our success.”
The second manager, Mr. Charisma, said, “That’s B.S. We just need common sense to get these people moving toward a common goal.”
The third manager, Mr. Technical, said, “Until we adopt better IT and process deliverables we cannot achieve our intended outcomes.”
The bartender leaned forward and asked, “So, where do you three work?”
The bartender’s implication is that these three voices represent three different organizations. But these perspectives could represent three conflicting voices within one manager’s head. Or your head. Or my head. And we process these conflicting voices in a millisecond.
Whatever you think (your theoretical construct or mental model) determines how you interpret the world (external stimuli or stresses) and make decisions (internal adaptation).
One manager turned back to the bartender and replied, “We all work on the same team at the same company.”
And the wise bartender asked, “How’s it going for you?”
There is a gap between those 3 models. Imagine a Venn diagram with Technology, Process, and People.
- Technology can be bought and sold, and used by competing organizations.
- Processes can be adopted or improved, and used by competing organizations.
- People and their social capital determine the unique success of your organization. Or your failure.
Organizational theories fail when they don’t provide systems for managers to make sound decisions. So, what works best?
Coaching people based on their expertise to make smarter decisions is the only solution with over 200% ROI. We guarantee that outcome. Since 1997.
But, not every person is coachable. You do not want to waste money.
Here is a 7-question assessment to find out whether you or your team members will benefit from coaching or not. It is based on my global dissertation research using professional coaches to accelerate leader outcomes.
P.S. Let me know if any of these 3 managers sound familiar to you. Or if you are coachable.
P.P.S. Or reply to the wise bartender’s question, “How’s it going for you?”
Action leads to learning. What are you waiting for?
To contact Doug Gray, CEO, PCC, call 615.236.1892 or contact us here. Today.
How Can Positive Psychology Help You Be A Better Leader?
You may have heard about Positive Psychology. But, you may not know “What it is? Why does it matter to you? How can it help you or your team?”
Here are some quick answers and 5 riveting videos for you to share.
1. Let’s start with “What is Positive Psychology?”
In simple terms, it is the art and science of well-being. Think of you “at your best.” Maximizing your strengths. Asking, “What would make my life more meaningful” or “How can my team flourish?”
2. Why does it matter to you?
Here are some of the benefits of Positive Psychology:
- Enhanced individual and organization learning
- Improved social relationships
- Better workplace performance and productivity
- Enhanced problem solving and creativity
- Increased job satisfaction
(Fredrickson, 1998E; Lyubomirsky, King, & Diener, 2005)
3. Now, how can it help you or your team?
Positive Psychology is a vast science with countless applications. The most inclusive model to describe well-being is called PERMA.
The PERMA Model was developed by my favorite psychologist, Martin Seligman. (We have met twice and discussed my research on positive psychology coaching.) I strongly recommend his seminal 2011 book, “Flourish”.
“PERMA” stands for the five essential elements that contribute to individual or team well-being. These are:
1. Positive Emotion (P)
For us to experience well-being, we need positive emotion in our lives. Any positive emotion such as gratitude, satisfaction, hope, curiosity, or love falls into this category. We each have subjective experiences of positive emotions.
I made a short video on Positive Emotion (P) for you. You can watch it here.
2. Engagement (E)
When we’re truly engaged in a situation, task, or project, we experience a state of flow. Time seems to stop, we lose our sense of self. We concentrate intensely on the present. We excel at challenging tasks. You can increase engagement for yourself and your team.
I made a short video on Engagement (E). You can watch it here.
3. Positive Relationships (R)
Humans are social beings and good relationships are core to our well-being. You can develop meaningful, positive relationships with others. We can measure fMRI images that describe the quality of your relationships. We can develop better relationships and accelerate behavioral or performance outcomes. (That was my dissertation research.) Curious about the details?
I made a short video on Positive Relationships (R). You can watch it here.
4. Meaning (M)
Meaning results when we serve a cause bigger than ourselves. Your meaningful outcome may be quantitative (e.g., earn $100k/year or give away 15% of earnings per year). Your meaningful outcome may be qualitative (e.g., care for your loved ones or serve humanity in some way.) We all need meaning in our lives to develop well-being.
I made a short video on Meaning (M) for you. You can watch it here.
5. Accomplishment/Achievement (A)
Many of us strive to master a skill, achieve a goal, or win some competitive event. Achievement defines us. Or not. Accomplishment is another element that contributes to our ability to flourish.
For specific details, I made a short video on Accomplishment/Achievement (A). You can watch it here.
Now that you understand the PERMA model, I hope you will use it to increase your well-being and help your teams flourish.
P.S. Let me know how you are flourishing?
P.P.S. Let me know if you like this long-form email or if you prefer the shorter ones?
Action leads to learning. What are you waiting for?
To contact Doug Gray, CEO, PCC, call 615.236.1892 or contact us here. Today.
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